When I embarked on a mission to raise awareness about child loss, I never imagined how far it would reach. I never expected my story to be thrust into the national spotlight. Two months ago, I pitched an idea to my news director about doing a three part series on pregnancy and infant loss. It’s a touchy subject, but he was very supportive, knowing my background of my triplets. As I began to put the pieces together, I interviewed the staff at St. John’s Children’s Hospital, where I delivered my children. I decided to add a little personal touch to the story because it would help make the topic more relatable. I know that many people in the community are familiar with my story, but I was at a different television station, from when I gave birth two years ago.
Within minutes of my story airing, I began receiving messages on Facebook and emails at work. Some viewers shared their own personal losses, others wanted to thank me for bravely bringing to light a topic that’s not often talked about…especially not in the public eye. A lot of people wondered how I even got through my introduction, where I shared the story of losing my first triplet, then my second triplet two months later. The truth is: I taped that introduction. I knew better than to try and share my story live on television. Even more than two years later, my children can bring me to tears in a matter of seconds. I miss them every single day; it’s obvious if you have ever heard me talk about my triplets.
Within 12 hours of my story airing, it spread throughout the internet. Yahoo interviewed me and shared my story on their website and other news outlets were contacting me. It never crossed my mind that being an open book would touch so many people. It made me realize how important this subject is and how grateful I am that I can use platforms, like television and social media, to help raise awareness and educate people about child loss. Over the next two weeks, I shared more stories of hope after loss. I introduced viewers to a beautiful organization that takes donated wedding dresses and creates beautiful angel gowns for babies who have passed away. The founder of “Allison’s Angel Gowns” has her own story of loss, and she’s using her angel to help others. I also introduced viewers to the term, rainbow baby, a child born after a miscarriage, stillbirth or infant loss. I met a sweet family who shared their story of weathering the storm of infant loss and eventually welcoming their own rainbow baby.
As I was wrapping up a month of emotional stories, I got a wonderful email from a writer: People.com was going to do a story about my family. Diane spent a lot of time on the phone with me, learning about me and Ryan and how we have coped with the losses of Parker and Abby. She learned about our survivor, Peyton, and how it’s obvious that she knows she has a brother and sister, even at only 2 years old. We talked about what it was like having to make the worst decision in life: telling doctors when it was time to end medical care for our son. And she took every little piece of our story and wove it together into a beautiful article. I could tell she did a perfect job when I kept getting calls from family and friends saying, “I hear your voice telling the story as I read the article.” The tears I shed reading our story on People.com weren’t tears of sadness, they were tears of strength and happiness. Seeing my story put on paper made me realize that my family has been through hell and back, but in the end, we’ve found happiness. We are living proof that you can survive the unimaginable, that life will continue and you can find peace after losing a child. Sure, there are many rough patches and there are still many heart wrenching days, but the happiness outweighs the sorrow.
As I read this article, I thought of the thousands of people who have reached out to me this past month. I thought of the coworkers who shared their stories of loss. I thought of the emails from moms of twins and triplets, who also had “survivors”. And I thought of the friends that I’ve made because we share that mutual connection of getting through the loss of a child. This article represents every single one of them. I have the opportunity to “break the silence” and tell the world that it’s ok to grieve, that it’s ok to talk about your angels. I have the chance to make a difference in so many lives and I will continue to honor my triplets as I do so. As reflect on these past few weeks, I can’t help but think of Abby and Parker. I know they are cheering me on from heaven; my little angels so proud of their mom.
To read People Magazine’s article, click the link:
Illinois Mom Shares Heartbreak To Help Others
The series on child loss will be up on my You Tube page later this week. In the meantime, click the links below:
Stacey’s Story Of Child Loss
Allison’s Angel Gowns
A Rainbow Baby
To follow Stacey and her family, click the link and “LIKE” the page:
Stacey Skrysak’s Facebook Page
Very nice story here. Since day one I have followed u. I just love seeing picture of the family and the progress that lil Peyton has done. You are a very strong women and so isn’t ur whole family.
Very nice story Stacey. It must be a comfort to help others by telling your story.
Peyton looks wonderful.
My brothers are identical triplets, not 18 years old. Well, technically there was two eggs, and one split to make three. So There is really a set of identical twins and then their fraternal twin. But almost all people, including our parents, can’t tell them apart. I’m the only one that doesn’t get them confused. My mom had in-vitro with them, and go pregnant with the triplets. And then 5 months later got pregnant with me and my fraternal twin brother, Jaymes, without any assistants. we are now 17. The triplets were born July of 1997, and Jaymes and I were born September of 1998. .So we all VERY close in age and emotionally. We do everything together and our lives are wrapped and entwined in each other.
I can’t imagin. I read this and started thinking If that had happened to my family. Which two of my brothers would I not have in my life. They’re such an important part of my life. So even thinking about losing any of them, not to maintain two, and never knowing them or having them part of my life make me absolutely sick.
My dad was in the military for all my life up until’ 2.5 years ago. And my stepmom was a district attorney and worked up to 14 hour days, so my sibling ans I were together constantly. We practically raised each other. I have 8 brothers, plus one foster (adopted when I was 11) brother, and 4 sisters. In total there was up to 15 kids in my house at one time. We are all biological, half, adopted,foster or step-siblings, And we are all very close in age. My dad and mom were never married and they split up right after my mom got pregnant with Jaymes and I. And My dad got married to my stepmom(HeatherLynn), his grade-school sweetheart, when I was 2 months old and the triplets were 16 months old. But I call Heather, Momma, because for a long time my actual mom wasn’t really involved in my life. She lived on the other side of the state and we rarely saw her, But Heather was there everyday.
When my dad would get deployed or stationed, we didn’t go with im. My parents wanted us to have a stable life and grow up in the same town (Cypress Texas), instead of moving every 18-24 months. Because of this my siblings and I spent all of our time together and were always there for each other. and even now when, with my dad at retired for the Marines, and my stepmom a stay-at-home mom, we still are extremely close. I look up to my older brother not just as brothers, but kinda as a father figure because of when my dad was gone. And even though the triplets are only 14 months older than my, I respect them and want to please them. I can’t imagine anything EVER happening to one of then, not to mention two.
I am so sorry for you lose, Stacey and Ryan And Peyton…God Bless you and your family.
Not only would I love to tell Peyton HI but also Abby and Parker because I know they see all you do and look up to you for it Stacy and Ryan you are brave and loving I know these 2 angels are looking over you guys each and every day
Thank you so much for telling your story. Our son is now almost six weeks old. His twin sister is our angel baby — she passed away shortly before her birth. We miss her every single day. I don’t know how we would survive the pain of losing her if it were not for our son. He gives us a reason to wake up every day, to breathe, to smile.
I had always heard that old saying: there is nothing worse than enduring the death of your child. Now I know that is absolutely true. Nothing in life will ever come close to the pain of saying goodbye to your baby.
Thank you SO much for making this a national conversation, one that needs to be discussed. I hope that more parents read your story and find the strength to share their own. Thank you.
So glad for you and the help you have given others. You are a great inspiration to other mothers and Mothers who have lost children. Keep up the good work. I believe God has a great plan for you and your family and this is only the start! Best wishes to you and your family!