It’s 3am on August 11th and I just tiptoed downstairs while the rest of my house is sound asleep. As I sit in front of my computer, I find myself pouring through hundreds of pictures from this past year. The tears are falling, yet my heart is so happy. For a person who talks and writes for a living, I’m having a hard time putting into words what I’m feeling.
Happy Birthday sweet baby girl. One year ago, our lives changed forever. Piper Avery arrived and little did we know that she was the missing piece to complete our family. She is our “rainbow baby”, a term that is often used in the child loss community. Piper is the rainbow after weathering the storm of losing two children.
This past year has been filled with so much joy, and so little sleep! Yet, I wouldn’t change a thing. As I sit here in the silence of the early morning, I find myself missing those early days. Boy, were they difficult, but oh-so rewarding.. I miss rocking my sweet baby girl in her nursery, her tiny body nestled perfectly in my arms. I miss the middle of the night feedings, my chance to binge watch hours of television as my baby relied on me to be fed. And I miss those early milestones, that moment when she first discovered my face, when she first smiled, and that first giggle.
Piper was the biggest surprise of our lives, even more shocking than finding out were were expecting triplets. But after years of infertility and closing that chapter of having more children, our “bonus baby” has been the biggest blessing. We can’t imagine life without her.
Piper is full of energy and keeps us on our toes. She has a contagious smile and is one of the happiest babies I’ve ever seen. She adores her big sister and I can already see a special bond forming between the two. And despite several months of sleep regression, she is such an easy baby.
In a year that was filled with so much uncertainty, Piper has been that ray of sunshine. I never imagined going back to work after maternity leave, only to become a stay at home mom a few months later (with a full time job!). A global pandemic may have thrown a wrench in our year, but we’ve made the most of being home together. It’s not easy trying to teach my oldest, while chasing after an extremely fast baby, all while trying to get some work done at home, but we managed to embrace the chaos. And through the stress, I have reminded myself to count my blessings. I’ve been able to watch my baby go from rolling over to crawling, and from crawling to taking those first steps. I am home for every sweet milestone, and I have a pandemic to thank for that.
It hasn’t been easy, but even during those difficult days of being a newborn parent once again, time seems to have flown by. This past year, I made it a point to take a step back and embrace this chapter of life. I slowed down, scaled back my writing and really made sure I was present for my children and family. Piper is our last child and I didn’t want to miss out on making memories.
As I look around my living room, the streamers and birthday sign are ready to greet our one-year-old. Too many presents are ready to be unwrapped. My blonde little baby is turning one, and at this moment, life feels absolutely perfect.
Happy Birthday Piper Avery. I love you to the moon and back.
*And thanks to all of you around the world who has been cheering my family on over the years. The support this past year and beyond is so comforting and special. I look forward to getting back to writing and sharing so much of my heart with all of you.