It’s OK to be sad during the holiday season

I found myself crying today in the school drop off line. And again, as I sat on the couch at home. Grief shows up at the most random times, and today it hit me: the holiday season is here.

As you gather around the table to celebrate, please be kind to those whose hearts may be hurting.

Maybe it’s a parent, a friend, or in my case, a child. When you lose a loved one, the holidays are a difficult time of year.

It’s been more than eight years since two of my children died, yet the grief still comes in with a vengeance. It’s always a balancing act—handling the moments of heartache, in between the happiness of the holidays.

And that’s what I want you to remember—grief and happiness can coexist.

It’s OK to be sad this time of year, even though you have so much to be thankful for.

It’s OK to say no to a “get together” because it brings up memories of a loved one.

And it’s OK to cry. No one should ever tell you how to grieve, even if it’s years down the road.

The tears rolled down my face today as I thought about what life might be like if I had my three triplets decorating the house for the holidays. And I know these won’t be the last tears of the season.

When you lose a loved one there’s a void, an emptiness that cannot be filled. So, as you gather around the Thanksgiving table, remember—you don’t have to hold it all in.

This is the face of a mother who has found a beautiful life after loss. But even through the laughter and smiles, the holidays can be bittersweet. And that’s OK. It’s healthy to feel that way.

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